Not Who I Am
by KlaineHasMyHeart
Summary: Summary Darren is in love with Chris, for a few months. He's afraid Chris don't feel the same. And another problem: Everyone thinks he's straight. Well, expect the CrissColfer shippers. He has a very awkward chat, with a lot of jokes, and stuff like that, but it gets serious. Darren comes out to Chris, and that he's in love with someone he met off-set. Chris is happy for him, but a
1. Chapter 1

**Summary**

**Darren is in love with Chris, for a few months. He's afraid Chris don't feel the same. And another problem: Everyone thinks he's straight. Well, expect the CrissColfer shippers. He has a very awkward chat, with a lot of jokes, and stuff like that, but it gets serious. Darren comes out to Chris, and that he's in love with someone he met off-set. Chris is happy for him, but a little bit sad, because he's in love with Darren, since the day he saw him. Will they become a couple?**

It was the first day of the break. Chris was in his trailer to relax before going home. He sat on his, little, cheap couch and sighed. He was in love with Darren Criss. His co-star. He stood up and opened his front, and only, door. He jumped back when he saw a face.

Darren's, beautiful, face. ''Dare, w-what are you doing here?'' ''I thought, maybe we can spent the last few hours of the day together. If you have time, of course.'' ''Eh, well, yes. But, can I pee first?'' ''Oh, yes, sorry.'' ''Doesn't matter. Back in a minute!'' He closed the door and walked to the bathroom. He didn't have to pee, just time to realize what Darren asked. He flushed the toilet and walked back. He walked out of his trailer and looked at Darren. ''Ready to go?'' Darren asked. Chris nodded. They walked to the parking place. Darren opened the door for Chris. ''Thank you.'' Chris sat down. Darren closed the door and walked to his own seat. He sat down and looked at Chris. ''So, you can have dinner at my house, and then we can watch a movie together. Only if you'd like to..'' ''I'd love to, Darren. You know I like watching those Disney movies with you!''

...

After they had watched The Little Mermaid and Snowwhite, they were too tired to watch another movie. Well, only Chris was. He fell asleep and his head was on Darren's lap. Darren just slept on the couch.

The next morning Chris woke up and felt a hand on his hip. He smiled for a moment but then he realized it was Darren's hand. His straight co-worker. He sighed and stood up, not willing to wake Darren up. Darren was straight, so why was his hand on MY hip? He has a girlfriend, a girlfriend who is jealous about our close friendship.

...

Once he was outside the house, Chris saw Mia, but didn't say anything. He realized Darren brought him here. ''Darren isn't at home, he's at the set, he gave me the keys because I had to pick something up..'' Chris lied. ''Ah, okay, I'll go back then, see you!'' She said with an disbelieving look on her face as she left. When she was gone Chris ringed Darren's doorbell.

''Chris? Why did you left?'' ''I thought it would be the best thing to do, but you brought me here, so you have to bring me home too, you know.'' Darren nodded and led Chris in. ''So, you want to stay for a bit longer or do you want to go home now?'' ''Actually now. I have a lot work to do. Sorry..'' ''You don't have to apologize, I understand. You're busy and I don't want to disturb you.'' ''Thanks for understanding me, Darren. You're the first.'' ''Really?'' ''Jep. Ashley always tries to get me into those parties where you drink beer like crazy, and more alcoholic drinks. I mean, she knows I prefer Diet Coke!'' ''You and your Diet Coke..'' ''What's wrong with that? It's delicious okay?'' ''Okay, okay. I believe you. Now, come on, I'll give you a ride home.'' ''Thanks, Dare.''

...

''So.. See you tomorrow?'' ''Tomorrow.'' Darren nodded. Darren sighed and drove home. Was it so hard to come out to your best friend? Actually, yes. Darren sighed again and stepped out of his car.

**A/N:**

**So, this is really new for me. I never worked with ratings and stuff, so.. Well, this is my first fanfic I'm going to finish. Tips are welcome. Always. I'm just thirteen years old, and my English is not really good, but I'll try. Hope you like it! :)**


	2. Chapter 2

Chris turned his lap top off and sighed. He walked to the kitchen and opened the fridge, took a can of diet coke of it and closed the door. He felt his telephone buzzing. It was a text from Darren;

''Hey, do I disturb you?''

Chris smiled. ''Never ;)''He texted back. He walked back to the couch and took a seat.

'';) So, what r u doin'?'' Darren replied.

''Just finished the last chapter of TLOS2, you?''

''Watching tv, texting you..''

''Something wrong?'' Chris asked.

''No, but I have to tell you something.''

''Do tell!''

''It's not funny, Chris. It's serious.''

''I'm Sorry'' Chris apologized and took a sip of his coke.

''So, what's the problem, buddy?''

''Well, I met someone.. And I think I'm in love..''

''Who is it?!'' Chris was getting nervous.

''I don't think you know him, but he's really kind, and I think you'll like him, too!''

''I'm happy for you Dare, but does this mean you're gay?''

''Yes. I always knew I was.''

''So, why didn't you tell me?''

''I don't know, I think I was afraid it would ruin our close friendship..''

''Why would it? I'm gay, too, and we're having sleepovers without having any problems with it!''

''I know, and I'm sorry I haven't told you first..''

''Don't worry, it's okay :)''

''Thank you Chris''

''You're welcome''

''I love you''

''What?!''

''Like a best friend ;)''

''Ow, then, I love you too ;)''

Darren sighed. He just lied to his best friend! He was afraid. And he was in love with Chris. He was afraid Chis didn't feel the same. But Chris thought exactly the same and was afraid too.

''Wanna do something tomorrow?'' Darren asked.

''Of course, but wanna do what?'' Chris said.

''Something...'' Darren teased.

''Ugh, stop being such a mysterious man''

''I can't, and I don't want to change''

''Good. So, movie marathon tomorrow or simething?''

''I'll think about it'' Darren smiled.

Chris walked to his bedroom. It was already late. He changed his clothes and sat on his bed. A tear fell on his cheek. He knew Darren would never love him the way back as he did. He walked to the bathroom and brushed his teeth. When he was done, he walked back to his bedroom. He laid down on his bed and pulled the blanket over him. He texted Darren ''Goodnight xx'', closed his eyes, and fell asleep.

Darren was still awake. He felt his cell phone buzzing. Message from: Chris. He read it and smiled. ''Goodnight xx'' He texted back and walked to his bedroom. He also changed his clothes and made his bed ready before going to the bathroom to brush his teeth.

**A/N: Sorry, it's short, I know. I'm sorry if there are any grammar mistakes AGAIN. I'm thirteen and this is my first English fan fiction ever, so.. Hope you liked this chapter! Next chapter there will be a movie marathon, and also a sleepover. It's a bit sad but has a happy ending ;)**


	3. Chapter 3

It was the next day. Darren and Chris were at Darren's house. Watching some movies. Not all of them were Disney movies, and Chris was glad about that.

''Want something to drink?'' Darren asked and stood up.

Chris nodded.

''Diet coke, as always?'' Darren asked.

''As always.'' Chris answered and checked his phone. Nothing.

Darren took a diet coke and just a regular coke out of the fridge. He walked back to the couch and gave the diet coke to Chris. ''Here you go.'' He said.

''Thank you.'' Chris smiled and opened the can.

''So, we watched a lot of movies, maybe just some music?'' Darren asked.

Chris nodded. ''What kind of music?''

''Something slow, I want to relax a little.'' Darren said as he walked to the stereo and putted some slow music on. He sat down next to Chris again and looked at him.

''I like it.'' Chris said, and looked at Darren.

''Chris, I have something to tell you..'' Darren said. He stared at the ceiling and closed his eyes for a second. ''You remember what I told you yesterday about a boy you didn't knew, right?''

Chris just nodded.

''Well, it was not 'just a boy' who I'm in love with.''

''What do you mean?'' Chris asked, confused.

''What I mean is..'' Darren paused and looked into Chris' eyes. ''Is that I'm in love with you..''

Chris was shocked. Darren did feel the same! ''I... I..'' Chris smiled. ''I love you too..''

Darren's eyes were wide open. ''You..''

Chris just nodded. ''Yes, I love you back, so what? I always loved you..'' Chris bit his lip.

Darren sighed. He took Chris' hand and smiled.

Darren cupped Chris' cheek with his free hand and kissed him slowly, but passionate. Chris was shocked, but just for one second. He returned the kiss and both of them closed their eyes. After a half a minute Darren let go of Chris and looked him straight in the eye. ''That was..''

''Amazing...'' Chris finished the line.

''You... You don't hate me?'' Darren asked, looking Chris in the eye.

''No, not at all.'' Chris smiled. ''I actually wanted this to happen.'' Chris said, blushing.

Darren smiled. They felt the same for each other, and now they kissed!

''So, we're a couple now?'' Darren asked, taking Chris' hand in his.

''Only if you want it, too..'' Chris said, not much louder than a whisper.

''Oh god yes!'' Darren attacked Chris with a hug and kisses all over his face.

''Okay, okay! Enough!'' Chris laughed when he saw Darren's sad face. ''Darren, I love your kisses, but not if they're everywhere but my lips, you know.''

Darren laughed a little and pecked Chris on his lips. ''Better?''

''Better.'' Chris smiled. The man he loved since he saw AVPM, was now his boyfriend. It was the most amazing day since he heard he had a role in Glee.

A/N: So, chapter three :). I ran out of time this week(oh god, never been THAT busy!), so it's short. Sorry :(. Shall I go on and write a next chapter? Reviews are love!


	4. Chapter 4

chapter 4

It was already late, and both Chris and Darren were tired. Chris yawned heavily. Darren laughed. ''Chris is tired, Chris is tired!'' Darren sang.

''Very funny, Dare. It was just a really busy week, and I didn't get much sleep, so yes, I'm tired.'' Chris said, his eyes half open.

''Poor you.'' Darren teased. He stood up and took both Chris' hands. ''Come on, let's go to bed.'' Chris nodded and stood up. They walked upstairs to Darren's bedroom. It was nothing new, they have had a lot of sleepovers, in the same bed. It wasn't a big deal for Darren, Chris was just his best friend. Now it had a meaning, they loved each other. Darren lifted his brand new boyfriend and kissed him. ''Ready for bed?'' Chris nodded and smiled. ''You can borrow something to sleep in, if you want to.''

''Darren, your pants are okay, but your shirts are just too small.'' Chris said, looking at Darren.

''I know, but you got you own shirt.'' Darren said, smiling.

''I know, I know, I know. I also know that your shirts are still to small, my sweet hobbit.'' Chris grinned. Darren set Chris back on the ground.

''I didn't hear you, did you just say you loved me?'' Darren teased and smiled at Chris. Chris laughed.

''Sort of. But there's a shirt that's too big for you, right?'' Chris asked. Darren nodded and walked to the closet. He took a black and white shirt with Mickey Mouse's on it out of the closet. ''Really , Darren?'' Chris rolled his eyes.

''I bought it for you..'' Darren said, not much louder than a whisper. ''I'm sorry if you don't like it, but is was so adorable!'' Chris rolled his eyes. ''Please, tell me you like the shirt.'' Darren said, pouting, and looking at Chris with his hazel puppy eyes.

''Alright, I like it Dare. I really like it.'' Chris smiled and took the shirt out of Darren's hand.

''Only because I bought it for you?'' Darren asked.

''No, because I adore Mickey, and because I love you.'' Chris smiled. He kissed Darren's on his cheek. ''Can I borrow a sweatpants or something?'' Chris asked. Darren nodded and took a black sweatpants out of the closet. Chris took it and thanked him. He changed in his Mickey shirt and the black sweatpants. Darren changed too. ''Really Darren? A pink shirt?'' Chris rolled his eyes.

''Pink is a cool color okay?'' Darren pouted and sat on the bed, beside Chris. He lay on the bed and took Chris with him. ''I can get used to this.'' Darren smiled.

''Me too.'' Chris sighed. He dreamed about this since he first saw him, and now, his dream came true. They now lay under the blankets, warm and close to each other. Chris was in Darren's strong arms, and he felt save. He felt loved, just the way he wanted to be. ''Darren?''

''Yeah?'' Darren asked, sleepily.

''I love you.''

''I love you too.'' Darren said. He took Chris' chin between two fingers and kissed him slowly. A few minutes later they were asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

Chris woke up in a empty bed. Was it all a dream? He looked around but it wasn't his bedroom. It was Darren's. ''Dare?'' Nothing. He blinked a few times to get a good sight. No Darren. Then he heard an angelic voice. Darren's voice.

''You're already up?'' Darren asked as he walked into the bedroom.

''Uh, yeah? Can't you see?'' Chris was a little pissed off. He wanted to wake up next to the man he loved, but no, he didn't. He woke up next to air, as always.

''I'm sorry, you're not a morning person, huh?'' Darren sat on the bed, across his boyfriend.

''I just wanted to wake up next to you, Darren..'' Chris bit his lip and blushed a little.

''I'm sorry, but there was someone at the door.'' Darren said, feeling guilty. ''Can I make it up to you with some cuddle time?'' Chris nodded.

''First I want my morning kiss.'' Chris said, grinning. Darren rolled his eyes and cupped Chris' cheeks and kissed him slowly. For a morning kiss, it was really sweet and passionate.

''Better?'' Darren asked and looked into Chris' eyes. The eyes he always loved, not just because of the colors, but also because they were Chris', and hey, they matched perfect with his beautiful face!

''Could be better, but it's okay for now.'' Chris teases. Darren sighed and pecked him one more time. ''Okay, enough for now. What time is it?''

''It's... 6:23 AM, so you can get some more sleep..'' Darren said, now sitting next to Chris.

''Ugh, it feels like it's noon!'' Chris said. ''I don't want to sleep!''

''Then, you can take a shower and change your clothes.''

''Too lazy.'' Chris said, and looked at Darren. ''Those eyes seem lazy, I think.''

''I can't see. Too much beauty.'' Darren said, smiling and stroked Chris' forearm.

''Someone's blinded by love.'' Chris laughed and kissed him.

''Uh, yeah, because you're so... Yeah... Sweet, adorable, talented, handsome, how can I not love you?''

''Eh... I don't know. But you're the most amazing person I know, and the most lovable.'' Chris said, smiling at Darren who was about to kiss him. ''No, no more kisses until... Now!'' Chris said, laughing a little and then kissed him. ''It's like we've been together for ages!'' Chris smiled.

''Yeah, but we're only together for like.. One day?'' Darren said. ''I don't know why I didn't told you. I mean, you are accepted, and why should I not be? I was afraid, but I could at least have told YOU. We were, and still are, best friends.'' Chris smiled. Darren smiled, too. Darren kissed Chris for one more time and then left the bed. ''You look really tired honey. You sure you don't want to sleep a little longer?'' Darren asked. He didn't want his boyfriend to be tired all day. That would suck. For both of them.

''No, I'm fine.'' Chris lied. He left the bed, too and walked to Darren. He stood behind him and put his arms around his waist. ''Do you think we are going to fast?'' Chris asked.

''No, I like it like this. Close to you like this is the best thing that ever happened to me. Why?'' Darren asked. He turned around to face Chris.

''Just... We're doing things like this since we became best friends, and now we still do the same thing, but now it has a meaning, and I afraid if we're going to fast, we'll break up soon. And I don't want to break up with you. Not now I have you.'' Chris said. Darren took his hands.

''Chris, honey. I love, and if you want to take it slow, I'll try to. It will be hard because you're just so, so damn sexy, and I really love it like this, but if ''taking it slow'' is what you want, then we will.'' Chris blushed heavily. ''Adorable. I forgot adorable.'' Darren teased and kissed him on the cheek.

''Shut up you! Just... Take a shower and change your clothes.'' Chris said. Biting on his lip.

''Now you're even more adorable!'' Darren said, making Chris blush like an idiot.

''Darren! Now! Before I'll kill you!'' Chris said. Darren took everything he needed and run to the bathroom.

2 hours later

''Time goes by sooooooo sloooooowww!'' Chris said, annoyed. ''And I'm bored. Even now I have you, the most energetic boyfriend ever!'' Chris said. ''Please, I want to do something..''

''Like what? You're the one who's bored. I'm not, because looking at you would never get boring.'' Chris got a little angry.

''Now you really should be aware!'' Chris said. ''I'm getting a little uncomfortable Darren.''

''I'm sorry.'' Darren pouted. ''It's just... I really, really love you, and I want you to know that you're the best thing that ever overcame me.'' Darren said, still looking at Chris.

It was silent for a moment. Chris was still bored and Darren was still staring at him. ''I've never seen you being bored before. What's the matter?'' Darren asked. Chris sighed and sat next to him.

''You're my first ''real'' boyfriend, and I don't know, maybe I just don't know how to handle it?''

''Don't tell me you're breaking up with me!'' Darren said, shocked.

''No! No, honey. I will never, ever break up with you.'' Chris smiled and kissed him.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: I'm sorry that it took so long. I had a busy period. Here's a new chapter, hope you like it!

''Good, because I don't want to lose you.'' Darren said, still a little bit shocked.

''I don't want to lose you either, Darren.'' Chris smiled. ''So, don't be scared about losing me.''

''If you say so..'' Darren smiled. ''Why don't you just come lay with me?'' Darren asked. ''I want to hold you in my arms.''

Chris rolled his eyes and looked at Darren. ''You held me for like... Well.. The whole night!''

''I know, and you were fine with that.'' Darren said.

''True, but that doesn't mean I want to be in your arms ALL the time!'' Chris said, angry. He was certainly not a morning person. ''Sometimes I want my own space. But I can't because you, Criss, want to hold me. Again! We're boyfriends for not even one day, and all you do is holding me like I'm a doll or something!'' Chris crossed his arms. Darren was afraid to talk to him. He looked at Darren and regretted that he shouted at him. He had teary eyes and Chris didn't like it. Mostly because he was the reason why they were teary. ''When I said I was fine with cuddle time, doesn't mean it had to be now. I actually wanted to cuddle tonight..'' He took Darren in his arms. ''I'm sorry I shouted at you. I'm not a morning person.'' He said, softly and kissed his forehead. ''I felt loved and safe, but it's just too much for a morning. I'm not used to it..''

''I know, and I'm sorry.'' Darren said, lifting his head a little. ''I just love holding you. I love the feeling you give me every time I look at you, and you just smile at me.'' Darren said. Chris smiled. ''There's that feeling.'' Darren smiled.

''Darren?'' Chris looked at him. ''Do you want to tell the rest of the cast? Or at least, may I tell Amber?'' Darren nodded.

''Mark is having a party at his house tomorrow, right?'' Chris nodded. ''Well, maybe we could tell them at the party.'' Darren said. Chris smiled.

''Are you sure?'' Chris asked. Darren nodded. ''We don't have to keep it as a secret!'' Chris hugged his boyfriend and kissed him. ''But we can't hold hands until you come out..'' Chris said, more like a whisper.

''I know, and I know you want to..'' Darren said. ''So, we just hold hands outside the house, and you know what? I don't care what people think. You're accepted, so why wouldn't I?''

''I don't know. So... You want to go public?'' Chris asked. Darren nodded. ''Yes!'' Chris screamed. ''Oh, sorry..'' Chris blushed.

''It's okay. You're happy, and I understand.'' Darren smiled and kissed Chris' cheek. ''I'm so in love with you, and I want to show the world that you're mine, and how happy I am that I have you.'' They smiled and kissed.

''I love you so much, Dare..'' Chris said happily.

''I love you too, Chris.'' He looked Chris in the eyes. Those wonderful, bleu/green eyes he loved so much.

-At the party the next day-

After they greeted everyone, they started to dance. After a few songs, the music stopped. Mark picked up a microphone and asked for attention. ''Guys, Darren wants to tell us something.'' He handed Darren the microphone. ''Here you go.'' Mark walked off the stage and looked at Darren.

''So, ehm, hey guys..'' Darren said and swallowed. ''There's something I want to tell you...'' He looked at Chris for a second. ''Me and Chris... We're together..'' It was silent for a moment, until Mark yelled.

''I KNEW YOU GUYS WERE DATING!'' He yelled. Chris smiled like never before. ''KISS! JUST KISS HIM ALREADY!'' He yelled and looked at Chris who was blushing right now.

''Here? Right now?'' Darren asked.

''No! On the stage!'' Mark said as he pushed Chris onto the stage. ''Now. Kiss.'' He said calmly.

''Do you want this?'' Chris asked Darren, not much louder than a whisper. Darren nodded and smiled. He cupped Chris' cheek and kissed him. Sweet and tender.

''WOOHOO! CRISSCOLFER IN THA HOUSE!'' Mark yelled, his voice high pitched. ''Ahum.. Sorry..'' He said softly. ''I told you it was real..''

''Yeah, I know.'' Darren said and smiled. ''I found the love of my life..'' He took Chris' hand in his and looked his boyfriend in the eyes. Chris' eyes were teary, but he smiled, so that was a good sign.

''Me too.'' Chris wiped his tears away.

''Okay, guys! Let's party! And Criss, be careful with my boy!'' Amber said. ''If you ever hurt hi-'' Darren cut her off.

''I will never hurt him. Ever.'' Darren smiled.

''Good.'' Amber said. ''You're warned.''

And then a slow number started playing and Chris and Darren left the stage. ''Where are you guys going? You should be dancing right now, not just looking at each other!'' Mark said.

''Fine.'' Darren said and smiled at Chris. He reached his hand out to him. ''May I have this dance?''

''Yes. Yes you may.'' Chris said. He took Darren's hand in his and smiled. They started dancing and Mark was still fangirling. Or, well.. Fanboying. ''I'm so proud of you, Dare..'' He wrapped his arms around Darren's neck and rested his head on his shoulder.

''I know, and I'm proud of being your boyfriend.'' Darren said and wrapped his arms around Chris' waist and pulled him closer.

A/N: So, what do you think? I think it's a good final chapter for this.. Reviews are welcome!


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